martedì 10 maggio 2011


So here's the deal.

I'm a HUGE fan of ABDC.
And I was so excited when the new season started.

I was over the moon for the fact that D-Trix from Quest Crew had been added to the judging panel (replacing super-boring Omarion) and immediately thought they had picked some really really fantastic crews.

A couple of things did throw me off thou.
1) This whole superstar thing. Blah. Going through one whole episode on Kesha was a nightmare and next week is going to be frekkin Bieber and I already feel like throwin up. Seriously c'mon!!! I would understand J.Lo or T-Pain or Chris Brown or even David Guetta. But frekkin Bieber?????
2) The under-age assault. I'm talking about the Iconic Boyz. I take it a bit as an insult that these little white kids, trained by one of the best choreographers ever to appear on the show (Gio from Iconic - season 1), that have been dancing only for a couple of years and that are really young, are already on this show. They're good alright, but I refuse to believe they're one of the best crew's they've found. Yeah it's marketing, it's publicity, it's the perfect opportunity to justify a whole episode on songs of another teeny weeny (frekkin...I'm not gonna write his name again).....but DAMMIT!!! Because they're "so young! Just kids! And they dance! They dance good! So cute!!! So adorable!!!" I fear they'll go all the way to the top. And they just don't deserve it.
3) Last week Request Crew (that was my favourite crew) was thrown out in favor of Street Kingdom. Ok now. I LOVE Tight Eyez. And I LOVE Krumping. It's so unique and powerful and emotional and crazy and beautiful. But this doesn't justify the crew staying on. It's non sense to keep the crew because D-trix is a huge fan of Tight Eyez and because they're krumpin on national tv and because they're from the ghetto. As a crew they don't know how to stand out and it shows 'cos Tight is ALWAYS the center of attention. There's too many of them and most of the time they don't seem to know what they're doing. Request on the other hand was the perfect crew. They have attitude, skillz, swag, creativity, precision, versatility. I thought it was plain ol bullshit that they got sent home.

I thought that it couldn't get any worse.


Episode 5: Rihanna. Challenge: dancehall steps.

Oh yes they did.
They brought DANCEHALL to ABDC.
The idea behind it made sense: Rihanna is from the Barbados and they play a lot of dancehall there.
But. Does Rihanna have anything to do with dancehall? Not so much actually. She has a couple of songs that get some inspiration from it (Pon de replay and Rude Boy) and she did a couple of collaboration in Jamaica, but really, she, and her sound now, have nothing to do with dancehall. A better artist to choose would have been Sean Paul (of course) or maybe even Wyclef. Or well...let's not forget that Damian Marley (son of Bob Marley) is one hell of an artist and just last year he released an amazing album with Nas.

They gave each crew a song by Rihanna and her choreographer, Tanisha Scott, give them the step they had to feature in they're choreo.
And that made me think again: this should have been Sean Paul's week. 'Cos Tanisha Scott was also his choreographer and did A LOT of videos with him.
So the girl is a dancehall dancer. And she knows what she's doing.
Or so I thought.
These are the steps she gave the crews:

 Instant Noodles (the b-boy crew) got the HEAD TOP.
 Does it look like a challenge to you? To me it doesn't. It was also really weird that she gave it to an all male crew, because it's a girl "power-move", 'cos men don't shake their asses. Especially not on their heads.
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Iconic Boyz got the GIVE DEM A RUN (video under pic.).
It's an iconic (ha-ha) step in dancehall, so I perfectly understand why it has been chosen's been around at least 8 years now, as it became known in 2003 with "Pon di river" from Elephant Man and it was also shown in the video fo "Like glue" from Sean Paul. I mean...THAT IS ONE HELL OF AN OLD STEP!!! 
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I was afraid that things would go worst and of course they did.

I Am Me got The Spiderman.
Which was fine actually. It's not a step that usually get's called out in songs but if you dance dancehall it just kinda comes out on it's own.
And I Am Me did a really fine job on it. They're my favourite crew now.
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And then...Street Kingdom got the DUTTY WINE.
The original song by Tony Matterhorn starts like this: "attitude gyal!!!". And the Dutty Wine is the epidemy of a girl step!!! Since 2006 girls have been swingin their heads and weaves and breaking their necks to the song and not only to that song! 
So what's the problem? Well outta 10 members there is only one girl in Street Kingdom (and can I add not a very sexy one). The idea of seeing these tough krumpers rolling their heads didn't appeal to me at all.
On top of that they got Rude Boy, which is a really nice song to dance to. slow wine to. The dutty wine needs ENNNNERRRGY and the songs doesn't have it. Period.
Was it bad? It was real  real bad. And Lil Mama and D-Trix can cry and praise them all they want but they sucked!!!
And miss Tanisha Scott: u suck too!!!
Why in the world would you give the dutty wine to a crew like that??? U ran out of old steps??? I would have loved to see them Sweep or Rubba Bounce but if these steps are too new for you you could have give them a Signal di Plane or a Wacky Dip or a Shovel it!!! C'MON!!!
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787 got the Gallis Step.
To be honest I had no idea what it was. Well no...I saw it and did it loads of times but I never had any idea it was called like that.
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Still going through really old steps Phunk Phenomenon got The Chaplin.
And there my jaw and balls and patience just dropped.
The Chaplin????
A step where you almost don't move???
A Heel-Toe (as old and over-rated as it is) would have been a better choice. Well actually no.
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What really really pissed me off during this episode was the fact that ALL these steps are AT LEAST 5 YEARS OLD!!!

So what about what dancehall has done since 2006???
The way it's grown, the way it has spread worldwide, the thousands of dancers that dance and create new steps everyday, the artists that more and more support and show these dancers and their dances.

Considering that ABDC has always done an episode to showcase the new steps and styles of Hip-hop I've found this lack of acknowledgement -on the growth of dancehall- lame and disappointing.

By the end of the episode I was actually furious and wlaked around the house almost shouting (lucky my mother is used to the fact that I'm not normal) and actually fell in a bad mood over the next 2 days everytime I thought about it.

'Cos c'mon!!! They could've done an episode on Elephant Man and shown dances like: Nuh Linga, Sweep, Gully Creepa, Sassa Step, Rubba Bounce and Steady Wine. Or an episode on Mr.Vegas and have: Tek weh yourself, Raging bull, Hot wuk, Gallis swing, Sassa step, Round of applause. And I don't even want to think at an RDX challenge, that would've been the bomb.


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